Entries tagged with “care”.

Well Beth is all moved into her brothers place and she seems a lot happier. No longer does she have to look around her place and think about things that need to be done. She was up in the morning to see her brother off to work and stayed up a while longer watching some TV.

I arrived early to sit/visit with her, she seemed in really good spirits and fairly well rested. I set up her laptop with the docking station, printer and wireless network. I also brought over the computer I built for her in case the company wants their equipment back, so it’s all setup as well. I checked in on work since I was on call and all was quiet. Beth took a nap around 5:30 and woke up about 8:00 pm and had some dinner. She stayed up and talked with Jeff and I and was a few shows with us. She then headed back to bed for the night. I finished a few things for her, documented her nightly meds and told her that I was not going to stay over as planned. Since I work from home it just felt better being at home with the way I have things setup.

I headed out about 9:30 pm and let Jeff know Beths status before I left.

I’ll be going over to her house and cutting the yard and checking on things in general to make sure things are as they should be. I am glad it’s not a 100 degrees around here, though it looks like it’s going to be that again in a few more day, DRATS!!


If you have read any of this site in the past few years you would know that I have a dear friend who has terminal cancer. This is not the first time I have been around someone dying of cancer, I am becoming a pro and I am not proud of that.

Here is the issue, Beth fell a few days ago and almost broke her nose. She got dizzy and was out of breath and fell. She remembers falling just before she hit the floor. Here oldest son heard her fall and found her on the floor with blood on her clothes and on the floor. So he made some calls, to me, hospice and one of her brothers.

Next thing I know there is a standing order that she can not be left unattended 24 x 7. Now she has fallen twice before a month ago or so and only sustained bruises. Now before you get opinionated keep reading.

So since the fall she has been assisted to the point that she is almost bed ridden. I was over there the other day and she wanted to get a new pair of readers and a puzzle box from Walgreens. Then the discussion went down the path that she can’t go unless there is 2 people with her (she has a wheelchair if needed and portable oxygen). Then the conversation went to she could go closer to when she woke up from a nap so she would have more strength. Then the subject changed to something else to avoid a resolution.
The other things are decisions being made for her more or less without her input.

I honestly think that doing this or treating people like this speeds up their incapacitation, making life harder on the person who is ill and then adding stress to the caretakers. (Who don’t realize this) I know her family has her best interests in mind but she does not have brain cancer, she can still walk, talk etc. She understands that she should take more time to get out of bed and that asking for assistance is ok. Though she is a DNR, even she doesn’t want to die by falling at home.

So if you read this, thanks. Be patient, spend time discussing things with them. Just because they can not answer you as if they were 20-something, listen and take what they think and feel into consideration.

I am sure this will rub some people. It is my observation as I have been down this road with my mom and Beth when she had cancer earlier and I was the ONLY one caring for her.

Nite 😀